Hi! Happy Earth Day.
Join us for another electronic newsletter where you’ll hear about the New Japan Cup, All Japan’s Champion Carnival, and Zeus’ Osaka Pro.
We’ll be back next Friday with so much more… or check out Happy Wrestling Land to see what’s already up!
Captain Lou’s Big Weekend (3/19 to 3/21/2022) - Captain Lou
Osaka Pro on GAORA Episode 1 (3/6/22) - Captain Lou
NJPW New Japan Cup 2022: All 45 Matches Plus Statistics - Dum Dum Daniels
NJPW New Japan Cup Finals (3/27/22) - Dum Dum Daniels
AJPW Champion Carnival 2022 Day 1 (4/9/22) - Captain Lou
AJPW Champion Carnival 2022 Day 2 (4/10/22) - Captain Lou
AJPW Champion Carnival 2022 Day 3 (4/11/22) - Captain Lou
Captain Lou’s Big Weekend (3/19 to 3/21/2022)
TOKYO JOSHI~! JUDGEMENT 2022~! MIYAHARA AND BIG SHUJ KILLING EACH OTHER~! WHIPASS~!
Maki Ito © vs. Yuki Arai – International Princess Title (TJPW Grand Princess 3/19)
Tokyo Joshi pulled all the stops for this Sumo Hall show. From the bombastic entrances to NJPW legend Hidekazu Tanaka handling ring announcing duties – it feels big. Although a bit light at times, Maki and Arai had themselves a Ryogoku-worthy title match. They worked with an effective Big Match layout and set up some clear themes that got over well. Ito was surprisingly competent in the grumpy veteran role, working the lower back and mugging for the camera like a pro. Lots of heart from both – Arai’s underdog determination coming through in those last few forearm battles. ***1/4
Yuka Sakazaki & Mizuki © vs. Rika Tatsumi & Miu Watanabe – Princess Tag Team Titles (TJPW Grand Princess 3/19)
The kind of match that might convert unsuspecting Puro Twitter weebs into die-hard TJPW stans. All action all the time – the four gals bringing high-level execution and major league urgency to Sumo Hall. Watanabe stole the show with her ridiculous feats of strength and came off as a can’t-miss future PRINCESS OF PRINCESS. That’s right, I know all the Tokyo Joshi lingo.
They kept a wild pace from bell to bell, both teams repeatedly outdoing each other with creative and energetic team work. As the Internet’s foremost appreciator of Leg-Based Psychology, I loved the Tanahashi-esque dragon screw onslaught from Rika. A whole lot of fun. ***3/4
Miyu Yamashita © vs. Shoko Nakajima – Princess of Princess Title (TJPW Grand Princess 3/19)
Total homerun of a main event. If this hit all the right notes for yours truly, the ultimate Tokyo Joshi neophyte, I can only imagine what it felt like for long-term fans. While the tear-soaked video package got the history across pretty well, the match itself managed to convey every piece of Important Information. Miyu: badass champion/ace figure – will kick your head off. Shoko: high-flying babyface challenger – loves the animal kingdom.
Let’s talk LAYOUT (*cough*). They structured everything around that supremely well-timed dive cutoff where Nakajima got her head ripped off. Working off a clear power dynamic, Yamashita (Kicky Aggressor) and Nakajima (Flippy Underdog) both fell in natural roles and the action grew organically from there.
Love character-based wrestling as much as the next guy, but it wouldn’t be a 2022 Sumo Hall main event without a few GIF-able Epic Moments. Thankfully, the big match thrills came flying left and right during the ending stretch – what with the European clutch-into-deadlift-German suplex sequence and assorted Skull Kickery from Miyu. I was also somewhat blown away by the decisive finish and lack of 25 mandatory kickouts. Very cool. I’ll be back, TJPW. ****
Saki Akai vs. Maya Yukihi (DDT Judgement 3/20)
The chemistry between these two was a bit on and off throughout the lead-up tags, but they managed to stick the landing. They resolved Maya’s DDT introduction storyline with a hard-fought match – local girl Saki having to prove her worth against a ‘’real’’ Joshi wrestler.
Both wore their emotions on their sleeve and it gave the match plenty of dramatic moments. What Akai sometimes lack in ring polish, she makes up for in facial expressions. It’s impossible not to root for this girl. The looks she fired off during the big slap-off climax brought this thing to another level. ***1/2
Jun Akiyama & Takao Omori vs. Kazusada Higuchi & Hideki Okatani (DDT Judgement 3/20)
Healthy bowl of meat and potatoes to celebrate Uncle Jun’s 30 years in wrasslin’. New Eruption member Okatani was more than game to step up as whipping boy in peril, eating a king-sized beating from the reunited AJPW Class of 1992. To no one’s surprise, Big Gooch fit with the All Japan dads like a glove and made old man Omori look about 10 years younger. ***1/4
Daisuke Sasaki © vs. Jun Kasai vs. MAO – DDT Universal Title 3-Way Match (DDT Judgement 3/20)
Three car crash enthusiasts putting the hurt on each other and ticking off the Hardcore Match checkbox from the DDT Big Show Checklist. Sasaki’s Universal reign has been pretty cold, especially after Yuki Ueno’s beloved run, but he can still get the job done in these prop-heavy settings.
The blood-soaked half-zombie face paint was a hell of a visual in a match featuring a whole lot of ‘em. MAO’s always beneficial to this type of match, as his weirdo brain and wacky acrobatics add unpredictability to otherwise-tired tropes. Very much looking forward to see what he does as champion. ***1/2
HARASHIMA & Naomi Yoshimura © vs. Chris Brookes & Masahiro Takanashi – KO-D Tag Team Titles (DDT Judgement 3/20)
CDK truly is the best possible use of Takanashi right now. The guy does nothing for me in singles matches, but his weird Toru Yano meets Johnny Saint bullshit somehow clicks in tag format. Likely because he can focus on the twists and turns while Brookes handles the workrate.
This wasn’t too far from the banger against ShunMAO at Korakuen – CDK bringing the high-level tag team orchestration and 2002 ROH multiman submission spots. God bless. Yoshimura and Brookes showed some firey chemistry for the finish, young Christopher going back to the unexpected physicality that made him a D-Oh 2021 standout and unleashing the true power of BRITISH STRONG STYLE. ***1/2
Konosuke Takeshita © vs. Tetsuya Endo – KO-D Openweight Title (DDT Judgment 3/20)
I’ve been extremely invested in Takeshita’s current KO-D run. The Akiyama influence and gradual shift towards a beefier, more traditional style has been fascinating to watch. He played Jumbo Tsuruta On Crack against Yuki Ueno and had straight-up meat-eating contests with Big Japan’s Yuji Okabayashi. It’s been a hell of a ride and unfortunately, it’s time to get off.
Weirdly enough, they wrapped up this reign with a match that didn’t exactly fit with Super Ace Takeshita 2.0’s new approach. Gone were most of the size advantage logistics of his recent matches. Gone was the air of quasi-invincibility. They went for a different kind of epic, not only playing off the previous Take/Endo encounters but also paying tribute to the entire history of DDT itself.
It’s not the match I had envisioned, but it’s something that made sense in the context of a 25th anniversary Sumo Hall main event. Match length perverts be damned, Take and Endo really did pack a lot of shit in the 46-minute run time. We’re talking high-tech Sasuke Special counters, apron Canadian Destroyers, Brainbusters to the floor and assorted nods to Antonio Honda and Poison Sawada JULIE. A ton of shit.
Obviously, I loved the idea of Endo using Akiyama’s Exploders to turn the tide near the end. Even if they looked a bit lame. Everything else looked flawless and ultimately, that will be the big selling point of this match. Just plain spectacular execution considering the length and complexity of it all.
As good this was, I still walked away from it realizing my interest in the Take/Endo story had now taken a backseat to the new scenarios Takeshita started exploring in the last two years. That’s on me though and not really a fault with the work in this match, which was pretty great. ****
Shotaro Ashino vs. Ryuki Honda – Last Man Standing (AJPW Champions Night III 3/21)
The rawest match of the entire weekend and one of Honda’s best showcases yet. Even during his shockingly-good match with Kento back in January, Honda still came off like an awkward kid playing villain. The evil smile during his entrance here and subsequent FAILED STABBING ATTEMPT (!?) told a different story.
These slug-fests with Ashino are helping him turn into a fully-fleshed sociopath. Dudes rock. Both guys brought buckets of hate to the table and Ashino pulled off one of the best finishes of the year with that SUPLEX CITY-style murder. At this rate, All Japan will have a new top heel by the end of the year. ***1/2
Hikaru Sato © vs. Hokuto Omori – AJPW Jr. Heavyweight Title (AJPW Champions Night III 3/21)
Speaking of Zen Nihon youngsters coming into their own, this was easily the best match of Hokuto’s career. He and Hikaru already a pretty decent slobberknocker during the dreaded empty arena period of 2021, but this reached another level. Heelish confidence, chef’s kisses and major league timing – Omori put it all together here and came off as a future player.
Hopefully, that gorgeous Dragon suplex will become a staple of his big matches, because it works better than all of his other current finishers. Props to Sato for being right there with the kid every step of the way. It’s literally impossible to have a bad match with this man and I’m glad he gets to show off for one more reign. ***3/4
Kento Miyahara © vs. Shuji Ishikawa – Triple Crown (AJPW Champions Night III 3/21)
The cursed COVID era gave us the definitive Kento/Zeus match in 2020 and now it has blessed us with a top-tier Kento/Big Shuj burner. My god, this thing kicked all kinds of ass. Ishikawa woke up with the burning desire to torture Miyahara in brand new ways and it led to his best All Japan performance in ages. Case in point: the pure delight on this man’s face after he nuked the champ with a Kaiju-sized baseball slide dropkick.
Miyahara rose up to the challenge of a motivated Ishikawa and put in the work. For all the complaining about his 5 Moves of Doom, the man’s genius resides in between those five moves. He’s always selling, screaming or pulling in the crowd with his facials. And for all of his cockiness, he’s not afraid to look weak – which adds danger those perennial match-closing forearm duels.
Like the aforementioned Kento/Zeus 2020 and some of those Jake Lee epics from last year, this was the Miyahara Template Main Event jacked up to 11. Which means they got to explore an entire new layer of reality – this weird, unpredictable dimension that exists only after someone kicks out of the Shutdown German. Shit was wild: new death moves from Big Shuj, 1 count kickouts and an absolute ALL TIMER of a Frankensteiner from the champ.
All Japan have needed a match like this for a while. After the Jake Lee injury and a promising chunk of the roster bailing on TAJIRI, things were looking pretty bleak. But with Kento back in MOTYC-delivering mode, young guys gunning for bigger spots and a hugely-promising Champ Carnival just around the corner, it might be time to dive back into AJPW TV. ****1/4
Captain Lou’s Review: Osaka Pro on GAORA – Episode 1 (3/6/2022)
There are two things I hold dear to my heart. The man known as Zeus and wholesome Japanese indie Osaka Pro-Wrestling. You can imagine my excitement when the Z-Man announced he would be resurrecting Super Delfin’s former playground. Zeus and his new crew struck a deal with GAORA and this 30-minute digest eventually landed on the Internet. Covering the pre-launch show from March 6th, this first episode is frustratingly clipped into nothingness, but still offers a fun glimpse at this new version of Osaka Pro. Let’s dig in.
Tsubasa vs. Ryuya Matsufusa
OG Osaka legend Tsubasa is now sporting a greying goatee under his lucha mask. Aging like a fine wine, baby. Meanwhile, young Matsufasa hails from Dotonbori Pro and looked promising from the 5 seconds of wrestling that were shown here.
The Bodyguard vs. Kuishinbo Kamen vs. Ebessan – 3-Way Match
Good news: the new Osaka Pro ref seems just as willing as Yukinori Matsui (former Kuishinbo/Ebessan dance partner now turned DDT main referee). Dude was already getting involved in all the shenanigans and taking hiptoss bumps. Respect.
Ultimate Spider Jr. & Takoyakida vs. TORU & Yuto Kikuchi
Swell-looking match that got clipped to shreds by the merciless GAORA editing crew. Spider and Takoyakida busted out a Dragon Gate worthy dance entrance. Dig the (natural) vibes. Newcomers TORU and Kikuchi looked like they could step in the Harada/Kotoge-type role of non-masked young Osaka babyfaces.
Tigers Mask vs. Joichiro Osaka
Before terrorizing All Japan undercards, comedic scumbag Izanagi (Atsushi Maruyama) was one of Osaka’s most beloved masked heroes. Seeing him back under the Tigers Mask hood brought the nostalgia, even in ultra-clipped mode. The Joichiro Osaka character was making his debut here and already feels like a potential highlight of the Zeus-led Osaka Pro. A masked boxer weirdo that wouldn’t look out of place fighting Survival Tobita. 10/10 indie sleaze gimmick.
Zeus, Billy Ken Kid & Ares vs. Kazuaki Mihara, Quiet Storm & Black Buffalo
The Osaka Pro Openweight title somehow survived these tumultuous last few years and now finds itself around the waist of Dotonbori Pro beefster Kazuaki Mihara. What was shown of the match felt like a vintage, hard-fought Osaka Pro 6-man that built towards a Zeus/Mihara title showdown. Honestly, I hope President Zeus selfishly books himself like the unstoppable ace monster All Japan never capitalized on. I need this man to run through the whole territory. The other highlight here was Ares, another debuting masked character who fit in seamlessly with his polished high flying. Praying to our lord and savior Super Delfin that we’ll be able to watch this stuff unedited in the not-too-distant future.
NJPW New Japan Cup 2022 (3/2 – 3/27/22): All 45 Matches Plus Statistics
There’s a lot of pro wrestling out there, but when the 18th annual New Japan Cup rolled around someone said, “double it.” Most astoundingly of all, someone(s) agreed. Before thoughts on all 45 matches — ranked least to best — here’s the 10 best wrestlers of the 2022 New Japan Cup based mostly on match quality (and count) but also weighted by fun factor, credibility, uniqueness, and leg selling. It’s something I’m working on.
The Best Wrestlers, Ranked Statistically
1. Zack Sabre Jr. (219)
2. Shingo Takagi (149)
3. Kazuchika Okada (124.5)
4. Tetsuya Naito (115.5)
5. CIMA (91.5)
6. Will Ospreay (75.5)
7. Hiromu Takahashi (72)
8. Tomohiro Ishii (60)
9. Hirooki Goto (49)
10. El Desperado (45)
The Bracket Bummers
45. New Japan Cup – Round 1: Toru Yano vs. Taichi (3/2/22)
A series of dad jokes that ended with a running elbow smash.
44. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Gedo vs. Tetsuya Naito (3/10/22)
15-minutes of stalling and figure-fours with none of the substance.
43. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Tiger Mask IV vs. Chase Owens (3/13/22)
Chase Owens continues living the niche dream of having mediocre singles matches with the early-to-mid 2000’s juniors division.
42. New Japan Cup – Round 1: Jeff Cobb vs. Togi Makabe (3/2/22)
Makabe takes just about every Jeff-plex available, but the match never quite works.
41. New Japan Cup – Round 1: Chase Owens vs. Jado (3/7/22)
At some point as the dilapidated Jado continued to try and deliver a wrestling match, it all got sort of admirable — still a no.
40. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Dick Togo vs. Hirooki Goto (3/9/22)
In a description that sounds a lot cooler than it was, Goto got beat up by Togo before fighting off bad guys with a bow staff.
39. New Japan Cup – Round 1: Aaron Henare vs. Yuto Nakajima (3/6/22)
Aaron Henare seemed to somewhat enjoy beating up young Yuto Nakajima, though only a little bit.
38. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Taiji Ishimori vs. Great-O-Khan (3/12/22)
Ishimori worked O-Khan’s arm here for a lot longer than was really necessary.
The Average Eight
37. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Kosei Fujita vs. YOSHI-HASHI (3/10/22)
Young Kosei goes for it. Elbows, chops, YOSHI. **
36. New Japan Cup – Round 2: SANADA vs. Aaron Henare (3/12/22)
This “SANADA” guy only seems to deliver in big matches against big stars, so having him go nearly half an hour against a guy who had trouble filling time with a young lion led to a boring main event when New Japan came to town. **1/4
35. New Japan Cup – Round 3: YOSHI-HASHI vs. Jeff Cobb (3/15/22)
The kind of match that could only work in the New Japan Cup, though it still only occasionally worked here: shoulder tackles, blah blah, near falls. **1/2
34. New Japan Cup – Round 1: EVIL vs. Ryusuke Taguchi (3/7/22)
This had more energy than the standard issue EVIL match, and he seemed particularly into selling the ass attacks. I thought that was noteworthy. **1/2
33. New Japan Cup – Round 1: Tetsuya Naito vs. Yujiro Takahashi (3/2/22)
Yujiro gets throttled here by a rolling koppou kick from his former tag partner, the lone highlight during 18 minutes of low energy wrestling. **1/2
32. New Japan Cup – Round 1: Hiromu Takahashi vs. SHO (3/7/22)
SHO drags Hiromu to the ring before the bell, Hiromu hits the sunset flip powerbomb on the floor, SHO hits a piledriver on the floor… Hiromu wins with a cradle. Weird match. They still haven’t had a really good one. **3/4
31. New Japan Cup – Round 3: Hiromu Takahashi vs. EVIL (3/18/22)
Just good enough, though not as good as it could have been. There was a devil on Hiromu’s shoulder called House of Torture hijinks, and he gave in bad. **3/4
30. New Japan Cup – Round 1: YOSHI-HASHI vs. Tomoaki Honma (3/2/22)
Tomoaki Honma wrestles at such a slow pace it borders on compelling, a Rusher Kimura for a new generation who doesn’t so much run the ropes, but falls into them. He and YOSHI-HASHI still went ahead and tried to have a whole New Japan match, and in fairness they occasionally got there: strikes connected, as did a few near falls, and one YOSHI superkick in particular seemed to just turn Honma to dust. Good effort, if not a reason to have 48 participants. **3/4
The Sweet 16 of Good to Very Good Matches
29. New Japan Cup – Round 3: Shingo Takagi vs. Chase Owens (3/18/22)
The possibility of a Chase Owens upset wasn’t really lighting up Korakuen, but Shingo sold his wrist enough to give this some meaning and if he didn’t get there, at least he sold his wrist. ***
28. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Master Wato vs. Kazuchika Okada (3/9/22)
Master Wato gets in so much offense on The Champ, too much offense really — Okada sells a Code Red, Wato’s little dinky submission… then hits the Rainmaker, pins him with one hand, and pats his chest before taking off to Round 3. A confusing match. ***
27. New Japan Cup – Round 1: Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. YOH (3/2/22)
This was solid, though disappointing considering the participants. Tanahashi worked a headlock, YOH worked a leg, and they brought the energy towards the end but in the New Japan Cup that’s easy stuff — Honma brought the energy towards the end. ***
26. New Japan Cup – Round 1: Yuji Nagata vs. Hirooki Goto (3/2/22)
Sometimes you just need a little arm work followed by a rollup. Nagata can do this match forever. ***
25. New Japan Cup – Round 1: Zack Sabre Jr. vs. Ryohei Oiwa (3/6/22)
Zack Sabre Jr. versus the Young Lion was good. The prison lock combined with a boot on the thigh for additional pressure was just mean. ***
24. New Japan Cup – Round 3: Zack Sabre Jr. vs. Great O-Khan (3/17/22)
This didn’t freak me out like their match in last year’s G1 Climax did, though there’s still plenty of quality grappling and leg-locking to be found. In addition to all the ways he finds to break down his larger opponent, ZSJ mocking O-Khan is quality wrestling too. ***
23. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Tama Tonga vs. EVIL (3/13/22)
This was a brawl that sustained the feel of an actual brawl the entire match, including Tama Tonga’s dropkicks that seemed like the dropkicks one might throw in a fight if anyone was strange enough to do that. It went on too long to recommend, though the angle after with Gedo orchestrating another Bullet Club split is semi-notable. ***
22. New Japan Cup – Round 1: CIMA vs. TAKA Michinoku (3/2/22)
Shiima Nobunaga and TAKA Michinoku were at various points in the late-1990s going to be the next big stars in junior heavyweight wrestling, until they settled for careers as journeymen and occasional businessmen who now find themselves gainfully employed by New Japan Pro Wrestling and opening the New Japan Cup. Is it success? I think so. This was a fun batch of nostalgia complete with a willingness (or need to) do big armdrags and dives to the floor. CIMA glides on a tope early and just thrashes TAKA with a few variations of the Meteora — he either still has it or is going to hurt people trying to prove he still does. ***
21. New Japan Cup – Quarter Final: Kazuchika Okada vs. CIMA (3/20/22)
Like Okada’s match with Master Wato, Okada is so giving to the underdog that it becomes borderline ridiculous, the crowd audibly shifting in their seats as he got in place for the middle-rope Meteora. The novelty of this match even happening was almost enough to carry it, but CIMA running through all his stuff and Okada looking down at him in disgust after he didn’t give up to the Money Clip brought it up a notch, too. ***1/4
19. New Japan Cup – Round 1: Will Ospreay vs. BUSHI (3/6/22)
18. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Will Ospreay vs. El Phantasmo (3/12/22)
Here were a pair of those good matches that I didn’t particularly enjoy. ***1/4
20. New Japan Cup – Round 3: SANADA vs. Will Ospreay (3/17/22)
These two had a match I flipped out over in the 2019 G1 Climax, but after subsequent rematches that might’ve just been an anomaly. The whoa was there, but like most matches it needed a crowd to reach any height it was trying to. Violent Will is an odd one too. ***1/4
17. New Japan Cup – Round 3: Hiroshi Tanahashi vs. Tetsuya Naito (3/15/22)
Tanahashi offers a hand, grabs a headlock, does the Naito pose… what follows is a good, solid professional wrestling match that felt one step behind from not only the classics they’ve had in the past but even their more low key matches, too. At this point these are still matches that are better than most matches happening anywhere, just ones that might test your patience. ***1/4
16. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Bad Luck Fale vs. Hiroshi Tanahashi (3/10/22)
Tanahashi will seemingly always be able to have a good match with Bad Luck Fale, this one a little less than their others though Fale’s clotheslines in the corner were awesome. ***1/4
15. New Japan Cup – Quarter Final: Tetsuya Naito vs. Jeff Cobb (3/20/22)
Neither guy had enough to keep this interesting past 20 minutes, but as Naito targeted Cobb’s leg and Cobb responded by tossing him all over the place they ended up getting a real stew going. ***1/2
14. New Japan Cup – Round 2: DOUKI vs. Zack Sabre Jr. (3/12/22)
They kept a fast pace the entire time here, DOUKI bringing the babyface fire while ZSJ went from confident walking down the ramp to outright mean trying to put down his stablemate. ***1/2
The Elite Eight (Nine)
13. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Tanga Loa vs. Shingo Takagi (3/13/22)
Tanga Loa, bordering on Officially Good now, goes along with the good timing and big impact of a Shingo Takagi match and provides his own twist on it by just continuing to keeping up. ***1/2
12. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Satoshi Kojima vs. Jeff Cobb (3/10/22)
Kojima took enough bumps, shot enough looks, and threw enough lariats to make this a tournament highlight. The final lariat is cash money. ***1/2
11. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Yoshinobu Kanemaru vs. CIMA (3/9/22)
A real epic Leg Selling kind of match, with CIMA having to overcome Yoshinobu’s targeted work plus his own Meteora to advance. ***1/2
10. New Japan Cup – Round 3: Hirooki Goto vs. CIMA (3/14/22)
CIMA was on a journey across wrestling styles in his first New Japan Cup, trading submissions with TAKA then selling legs with Kanemaru before this match where he goes all laid back Strong Style with Hirooki Goto. CIMA finds success early going after Goto’s neck, and Goto has to resort to a pescado to find any offense — a move that he follows up with a kick to the guardrail out of frustration.
The way they build to the end here is really great, playing with the distant possibility of a CIMA win that became closer with every near fall: he gets absolutely blasted with a kick followed by the Ushigiroshi but kicks out at 2, then counters the GTR with a backslide for 2, then hits the Schwein for 2, then a sliding elbow for 2, then the Meteora from the middle for a phenomenal 3. ***3/4
9. New Japan Cup – Semi Final: Kazuchika Okada vs. Tetsuya Naito (3/26/22)
Like Tanahashi/Naito from earlier this match didn’t capture the magic of year’s past, extra disappointing given the Semi Finals placement even if it was still was The Match that Okada and Naito have from time to time and a casual ****. Twist rollup ending too.
8. New Japan Cup – Quarter Final: Shingo Takagi vs. Hiromu Takahashi (3/21/22)
This started all fast and frantic and mostly stayed that way as Shingo and Hiromu delivered an excellent match that was just missing some pieces. There’s a story in Hiromu the underdog, but a crowd reacting to his climb uphill is a real big piece. ****
7. New Japan Cup – Round 3: Kazuchika Okada vs. Taichi (3/14/22)
Okada vs. Taichi does not miss. That’s just proven now. When they’re in the ring together everything connects a little more, is paced more urgently, and though it probably won’t happen they make it feel like Taichi might actually get that win. ****
6. New Japan Cup – Round 2: Minoru Suzuki vs. Hiromu Takahashi (3/13/22)
Slaps. This was two of wrestling’s best reactors slapping each other and reacting to it for 20 minutes. Like the cradle battle in last year’s BOSJ with Taguchi, Hiromu has one of the best matches of the tournament by doing something weird. ****
5. New Japan Cup – Semi Final: Shingo Takagi vs. Zack Sabre Jr. (3/26/22)
Another side of the coin, here was two of wrestling’s best reactors having a really good wrestling match for 20 minutes. Each guy hits as hard and reacts as big as possible as Shingo tries the usual main event run but finds his body ravaged from rounds one through however many, open to attack from ZSJ who just keeps wearing him down by attacking a limb or just wrapping himself around him like a snake or Voldo from Soul Calibur. ****
The Final 4
4. New Japan Cup – Quarter Final: Will Ospreay vs. Zack Sabre Jr. (3/21/22)
The exchange of cradles at the end of this match is brilliant, just brilliant. ****1/4
3. New Japan Cup – Round 1: Kazuchika Okada vs. El Desperado (3/2/22)
Since he regained the IWGP Heavyweight Title at the Tokyo Dome, Okada has changed his entire disposition — he’s wiser, more confident, he even seems taller. Before Desperado’s leg work actually starts causing pain he’s more annoyed than anything too, the IWGP Jr. Heavyweight Champion who’s whole deal is out-performing expectations trying to do it again.
When Okada tries a standard signature spot with a dropkick off the top rope, Desperado is among a select few ready for it. Eventually the leg work downright surgical, and after Okada rallies back he drops the too cool for school act and screams out loud before dropkicking Desperado across the ring. They pick up the pace towards the end before Okada sells Desperado’s stretch muffler like it’s something that could end him too, all the confidence displayed early on paying off. Supreme match. ****1/4
2. New Japan Cup – Round 1: Tomohiro Ishii vs. Shingo Takagi (3/7/22)
The greatest match that I have nothing much to say about, filled with so much “did you just hit me that hard motherfucker” energy that this duo can still channel into some of the most high-end pro wrestling possible. ****1/2
1. New Japan Cup – Final: Tetsuya Naito vs. Zack Sabre Jr. (3/27/22)
New Japan Cup 2021 was a drag, but it did have three matches I really liked and two of them had these two right here (Naito vs. O-Khan, ZSJ vs. Ospreay). The other match? Taichi vs. Goto.
They bring the dueling dipshit attitude which keeps the matwork cooking, the story of ZSJ having an answer for everything which keeps the match cooking, and a big time finish that managed to stand out above anything in the Cup besides maybe match #2. ZSJ wins the New Japan Cup a second time and prepares for a second showdown with Okada, too, with both guys re-built to the point that it’s a momentous occasion. ****1/2
Happy Thoughts: Through wrestling matches — maybe too many wrestling matches, but wrestling matches nonetheless — New Japan built their March Madness to a peak and came roaring back into the heart and mind of this particular wrestling fan. 4.5 / 5.0
NJPW New Japan Cup 2022 Finals (3/27/22): Clear Eyes, Strong Hearts, Can’t Lose
Given New Japan’s reliance on uneventful tags to rest their talent and fill out shows, delivering 45 singles matches inside of one-month is kind of a big deal. Throughout the month of March, 48 competitors vied for the largest New Japan Cup there’s ever been. Two of them exited with injury and 16 received second-round byes chosen out of a deep hat or something. The Finals took place at Osaka Castle Hall, as did the Semi Finals one night prior. Preceding both were (mostly) uneventful tags.
1. BUSHI vs. Kosei Fujita
BUSHI was by the book here in giving young Kosei Fujita ring experience while kicking his ass. Great opening match. *1/2-ish.
2. Tama Tonga, Tanga Loa, Ryusuke Taguchi, Master Wato & Jado vs. Bad Luck Fale, Chase Owens, Taiji Ishimori, El Phantasmo & Gedo
The Guerillas of Destiny and Jado were kicked out of the the Bullet Club during the tour, another chapter in a story that keeps delivering lukewarm payoffs because it’s driven less by booking sense and more an assortment of contract or travel restrictions — which, as we know, have always been the coolest and most interesting parts of professional wrestling. *1/2
3. Tomohiro Ishii, Toru Yano & YOH vs. Minoru Suzuki, Taichi & Yoshinobu Kanemaru
In between a few minutes of Toru Yano on defense and YOH comeback that ended unsuccessfully, Ishii and Suzuki brought some fire enough fire to call it even. **1/2
Happy Thoughts – NJPW New Japan Cup (3/4/21 – 3/21/21)
4. El Desperado & TAKA Michinoku vs. SHO & Yujiro Takahashi
SHO is next up for Desperado, so: SURPRISE! He taps out TAKA in 30 seconds, a welcome-ish twist. *
5. Hirooki Goto, YOSHI-HASHI, Togi Makabe & Tomoaki Honma vs. Will Ospreay, Great-O-Khan, Jeff Cobb & Aaron Henare
CHAOS knows how to bring the fun, or at least fill time on the undercard in a respectable way. I thought Honma chopping Cobb down like a big tree was fun, and YOSHI-HASHI and Great O-Khan might stumble their way into an excellent chemistry. ***
6. Shingo Takagi & Hiromu Takahashi vs. EVIL & Dick Togo
Shingo is in that phase one finds themselves in from time to time where he became so synonymous with being The Champion that in the aftermath of losing The Championship, he feels aimless despite still being high on cards and the exact same wrestler (see: Kazuchika Okada). Hiromu and EVIL have their sights on each other as they find their own way around the New Japan ranks too, and they continued their beef here in between signatures by Shingo and stomps from Dick Togo **1/2
7. Kazuchika Okada, Hiroshi Tanahashi, Satoshi Kojima & Tiger Mask IV vs. Tatsumi Fujinami, CIMA, T-Hawk & El Lindaman
New Japan turns the undercard tag on its head by literally having Okada standing on his own head while exchanging holds with Tatsumi Fujinami, but also by taking a spotfest approach with a bunch of great bits leveraging the novelty of a 68-year-old man known as The Dragon tagging with CIMA and the boys in a New Japan ring: intimidating and subtext-filled staredowns, dragon screw leg whips, and a star-making run from T-Hawk. ***1/2
NJPW New Japan Cup 2022 (3/2 – 3/27/22): All 45 Matches Plus Statistics
8. New Japan Cup – Final: Tetsuya Naito vs. Zack Sabre Jr.
Last year’s Cup was a drag, but it did have three matches I really liked and two of them featured Tetsuya Naito (vs. Great O-Khan) and Zack Sabre Jr. (vs. Will Ospreay). It makes sense too as these are two guys who have great matches with opponents who don’t always them, opponents who may have some ideas but need a point of view to match up against. That can include each other too. I loved their match in the G1 Climax 2020, the G1 rematch in 2021 match not so much but Naito got hurt so it’s a wash.
They brought their dueling dipshit attitudes bell-to-bell, which carried the quiet moments between vicious elbows to the neck and aggressively creative counters like a jackknife cradle countered with a triangle choke. ZSJ has reached the point in his career one rarely achieves where he’s workshopping so many new moves he’s giving them names, this salty crafty and skinny man who seems to have an answer for everything the confident but exhausted Naito was trying.
A gigantic tournament ended with a gigantic finishing sequence that, though there’s words to be had with the formula in general, impressively stood out above anything in the Cup besides another Ishii vs. Shingo. ZSJ wins the New Japan Cup a second time and prepares for a second showdown with Okada, too, with both guys re-affirming their status as they advanced round after round. ****1/2
Happy Thoughts: The New Japan Cup was ambitious, but ended up working out. Good wrestling, fresh directions, and the final night ended with two top matches well worth seeking out. 4.0 / 5.0
Captain Lou’s Review: AJPW Champion Carnival 2022 – Day 1 (4/9/22)
‘’Yo yo yo let me speak on this – Konnan’’
– Captain Lou
Yoshitatsu vs. Takuya Nomura – Champion Carnival (Block B)
Out of the entire 2022 Champ Carnival lineup, Takuya Nomura was probably the buzziest new entrant. Deep Puro Twitter favorite and legit-great pro-wrestler – he’s the shot in the arm that this tournament needed. WORLD FAMOUS Yoshitatsu, also known by true wrestling experts as The GOAT, seemed to take exception to this and decided to put the Big Japan darling in his place. And it was wild.
The Bullet Club Hunter turned Nomura’s usual feisty approach on its head and gave him the young lion treatment for most of the match. Tense slap-fests and angry shit-talking all over the place – the right way to kick off this tournament. ***1/2
Ryuki Honda vs. T-Hawk – Champion Carnival (Block A)
The Carnival’s going to be a big test for Honda and his new heel persona. Judging by this match, he’s still in the process of figuring out his Control Segments (*I felt a sharp pain in my chest while typing that sentence). HOWEVER, T-Hawk is so good at selling and reacting that Honda’s lack of offense didn’t really matter. Just a super energizing babyface performance from the Hawkster – the Strong hearted lad working the crowd like a pro and timing his choppy comebacks with razor-sharp precision. ***
Shuji Ishikawa vs. Shigehiro Irie – Champion Carnival (Block A)
These guys had a brain damage-heavy GAORA TV slug-fest not too long ago. They stayed away from the shoot headbutts here but actually ended up having a better wrestling match. When your forearm strikes sound so god damned loud, I’m not even sure you need the headbutts in the first place.
As expected, the match brought large quantities of meat to the table, but it was the ending stretch that really put it over the top. Irie relentlessly gunning for that choke finish brought some real danger to those last few minutes and made Big Shuj’s downfall even more satisfying. Good shit. ***1/2
Jake Lee vs. Shotaro Ashino – Champion Carnival (Block B)
He’s back. The Caped Crusader. Gotham’s Protector. The Dark Gentleman Jake Lee has returned to Edion Arena. I’ve missed this melodramatic tall man and his sky-pointing ways. The goal of the match was to build Jake back into his 2021 killer form, which means Ashino got his ass kicked for most of this. It wasn’t anywhere near the Triple Crown limb surgery clinic they had last year, but it was structured efficiently to turn Ashino’s win into a total shocker. ***1/4
Kento Miyahara vs. Kuma Arashi – Champion Carnival (Block B)
The polar opposite of Kuma’s 2020 Carnival run where he came off as a borderline comedy act getting squashed by Suwama. They had themselves a high-energy Miyahara template burner and Arashi finally looked like he belonged. By working each other so much during the Nextream tag reign, these guys clearly developed some chemistry.
This felt like the ultimate payoff and Kuma actually winning was the icing on the cake. The various senton spots came off as nuclear bombs, Kento selling his ass off to make Kuma look like a proper monster. I’m not gonna tell you that Arashi should be a permanent main event guy in AJPW, but this feels like a good opportunity to at least get him a title shot. ***3/4
Suwama vs. Yuma Aoyagi – Champion Carnival (Block B)
It took them a while to get going, but once they settled on their usual structure (grumpy vet Wama putting goofball babyface Aoyagi through the wringer), there was a solid time to be had. Big Wama still has the best offense in wrestling and I could watch him clobber people for hours. Essentially, Ryuki Honda should watch more Suwama matches.
ANYWAY, Yuma picked up the upset here and while an undeniably cool moment – the match kind of lacked the drama of their 2021 bangers. The Big Match Wama destruction was there and so was the Aoyagi babyfacing, but it didn’t quite feel like the ultimate Passing of the Torch moment that it could’ve been. Still, a slightly underwhelming Wama/Aoyagi match remains better than most matches. ***1/2
Captain Lou’s Review: AJPW Champion Carnival 2022 – Day 2 (4/10/22)
Shuji Ishikawa vs. T-Hawk – Champion Carnival (Block A)
The easiest way to have a good wrestling tournament is to put T-Hawk in your wrestling tournament. It really is that simple. Big Shuj must love this man as much as I do because he let him stay on offense for 90% of this match.
A wise decision if there ever was one, as the Hawkster pulled the always-impressive balancing act of pleasing a live crowd (aka. constant babyface interactions) and pleasing insufferable nerds on Twitter (aka. Working The Leg). The constant knee dropkick cut-offs were tremendous and I’m still shook by that wild back and forth where he snuck in a tricky drop-toe-hold to setup the Cerberus. Very cool match. ***1/2
Yuma Aoyagi vs. Takuya Nomura – Champion Carnival (Block B)
Ridiculously entertaining bitch-fest – up there with Kento/Kuma as a current top match of the tournament. While Yoshitatsu responded to Nomura’s aggressive style by pulling rank and going full shooter, Aoyagi took a completely different approach. This brat cranked the troll-meter to 11 – fake crying after the opening slap and literally spanking the BJW lad. There’s no other way around it: this shit is Future Ace material.
The straight wrestling sections were simple but effective, both guys leaning into the interpromotional hatred to get from point A to point B. I have a feeling we’re just scratching the surface with this Nomura Carnival run. Can’t wait to see him against Wama and Kento. ***3/4
Kento Miyahara vs. Suwama – Champion Carnival (Block B)
These two are over enough that they could’ve coasted on their charisma for the entire 30-minute run time, but they ended up having a banger with plenty of meat around the bone. Once they got past an admittedly stretched-out floor brawling section, the working boots were put firmly on. I must reiterate that Big Wama is an underrated Worker of the Leg and his Leg Work game was in full effect here.
The big man knows how to take a story full circle – what with him kicking the bad leg to get out of the first Shutdown attempt. That’s right, I understand wrestling. Meanwhile, Miyahara was very much in Big Match Mode – juggling comedy with dramatic selling and fiery babyface comebacks. That late-match Frankensteiner is the greatest possible addition to his repertoire. Take these stars, god damnit. ****
Captain Lou’s Review: AJPW Champion Carnival 2022 – Day 3 (4/11/22)
Yoshitatsu vs. Kuma Arashi – Champion Carnival (Block B)
Some people invest themselves in the AEW vs. WWE war. Others make New Japan podcasts. I am here to push the Yoshitatsu Is Good Actually discourse to the forefront of the Internet Wrestling Community. And this tournament is making my life a lot easier, since OUDOU STRONG STYLE legend Yoshitatsu is now 2 for 2 when it comes to Good Wrestling Matches.
It sure didn’t hurt to be across the ring from Kuma – the beloved bear enthusiast having a pretty solid tournament himself. Food for thought: Kuma’s Vertical suplex looks more impactful than most people’s finishers. Both worked hard and made everything count. Two pros. Two bros. ***1/4
Shotaro Ashino vs. T-Hawk – Champion Carnival (Block A)
WRESTLE-1 perverts all across the world still cherish the memory of the absolute scorcher these two had back in 2019. This didn’t have the main event slot or Epic Papa Roach Montage ™, but they still managed to steal the show. Off the charts intensity for all pulse-pounding 12 minutes – Ashino and T-Money clearly relishing the opportunity to beat the fuck out of each other one more time.
Ashino’s thick-headed bravado was just the spark needed to turn T-Hawk into a complete monster. The chops landed in the top echelon of the Go Shiozaki Scale and Ashino was practically begging for more (until T-Hawk went full Tenryu on his jaw). They really had the optimal Champ Carnival midcard match – compact, stiff as shit and left you wanting more. ***3/4
Suwama vs. Takuya Nomura – Champion Carnival (Block B)
The Nomura Carnival run is the gift that keeps on giving. This kid had the balls to challenge actual amaresu terror Suwama to a mat wrestling showdown and shit just escalated from there. There’s this recurrent theme in Nomura matches – the sense that someone’s about to work themselves into a shoot. Clearly, some Maeda tapes were watched.
That kind of looming dread reaches a new level when you’re in the ring with the Wamster and the big dude starts throwing full force slaps and lariats. Long story short, I feared for Nomura’s life for most of this. You can’t ask for a lot more from a wrestling match. ***1/2
Jake Lee vs. Shuji Ishikawa – Champion Carnival (Block A)
The Dark Gentleman Jake Lee was feeling himself here. Showing off with the BJJ mat opening and then casually shifting between Arm Work Jake Lee and Anime Villain Jake Lee. It seems I’m the Internet’s only supporter of current Heel Jake Lee and for my money, he’s not missing much.
His most glaring flaw at this point is the late-match pacing. The dude slows things down exactly when you want him to pick up the pace. He really is the Anti-Kento in that regard. Thankfully, Big Shuj was there to liven up those ending stretch dynamics. The big dawg is having a hell of a Carnival so far – loved the spot where he just unloaded on Jake while his leg got caught in the ropes. Solid wrestling was solid. ***1/2